How Good Habits Will Improve Your Success

May 15, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Have you ever caught yourself doing something that doesn’t really work, but then you still do it over and over again?  I know I have. In our personal and business lives we sometimes find ourselves stuck with ineffective habits—even when we know better. Other times we just do things because we have always done them that way and we don’t think about whether what we do works or not.

Recently my daughter and I watched the TV show Supernanny and I was amazed how quickly the nanny honed in on the kids bad, ineffective habits. With compassion and a few fun charts even the most misbehaved kids turned the corner. So it can’t be that hard if a kid can do it!

Take a moment and look at what you do every day. Bad habits suck away your time and do not generate new leads, clients or money.  For example, how do you organize your time?  Do you let distractions interfere with the work you need to get done?  Succeeding is about having a razor sharp focus and accomplishing everything you set out to do in a day.  That’s a good habit.  Leaving the office at 3 pm to pick up your kids is not a bad habit, and neither is working out or taking care of a parent. You should not feel bad or guilty for taking care of your family first. But then, just like the single father played by Will Smith in the movie “The Pursuit of Happiness,” you have to figure out how to do in six hours what others do in nine!  You might find this WSJ article about the pursuit of happiness interesting.  http://goo.gl/qLHKj

Ask yourself these good habit questions: Do you put money and cash generating habits first? Do you write down at the beginning or end of each day what you want to accomplish? Do you set realistic goals? Can you ignore distractions such as Facebook and Twitter updates when you are in the middle of something? Are you making your business calls?

Try These Tips:
–Start your day by making a list of what you want to accomplish.
–My rule of thumb is that I want to get five things done in a day, and no more than three
errands.
–Allocate a real-time slot for your to-accomplish items – and put them in your calendar!
–When I’m writing I will not get up until I have finished. Make it your habit not to get coffee or a snack until you’re done with your assigned, scheduled task.
–Put a kitchen timer on your desk. Allocate one hour to making calls, then get up for five minutes and get your coffee.
–Continue with this time allotment for research, accounting or whatever else there is.

Now you are in front of your time instead of running after it.  But remember, your primary rule of thumb is that what generates income gets done first!

Beate Chelette is a respected career coach, consummate entrepreneur and founder of The Women’s Code, a unique guide to personal and career success that offers a new code of conduct for today’s business, private and digital world. Determined to build a community of women helping each other, after selling one of her companies, BeateWorks, to Bill Gates in 2006 for millions of dollars, Beate created The Women’s Code.   In February 2012, to reach women everywhere, Beate launched The Women’s Code Online course. http://beatechelette.com/the-womens-code

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How To Tweak Your Thinking

May 9, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Thoughts are powerful. They create feelings and take form in our lives in ways we like and don’t like. One of the aspects of my business is that I pay very close attention to my way of thinking.  Since I first read the book “The Power of Positive Thinking” in my 20s, I have made an ongoing and conscious effort to be in charge of what I think. I want to think about things that make me feel good, so whatever form they take will be a good thing, too.  I have the book’s author Norman Vincent Peale to thank for that. Here’s a link to his book, if you’re interested.  http://goo.gl/bQcDX

Sometimes though, thinking positive when things are just not working right is very hard.  I know, it happened to me.  Eight years ago I was down on my luck, $130,000 in debt, my father had just passed away and I was thrown out of my home and office that I had occupied for ten years.  I’m not going to lie; it was tough and I often thought this was too hard to get through.  Positive thinking just wasn’t working and then I came up with what I now call my gradual improvement method. It certainly worked for me, because in 2006, I sold my company to Bill Gates and made a fortune. http://goo.gl/WxM02

The method goes like this: first you refuse to accept that where you are is all there is.  You’re a good person, honest and responsible, so there has to be more out there for you. Next, focus on wanting to do better. This works equally well for business and your emotions. Don’t say, for example, “I don’t want to struggle anymore.” Instead, use the positive affirmation of  “I will do better. Things are picking up. I have a good feeling that this will work out.”

Call yourself fortunate or lucky and whatever other positive words you can find.  Stay in this mindset and gently correct yourself when you slip. This is crucial in business and since we can tweak just about anything now, it stands to reason that we can tweak our way of thinking.  If you believe in yourself, in your talents, your expertise and your passion, guess what?  Your clients will pick up on that energy and new projects will likely to come your way.

 

Beate Chelette is a respected career coach, consummate entrepreneur and founder of The Women’s Code, a unique guide to personal and career success that offers a new code of conduct for today’s business, private and digital world. Determined to build a community of women helping each other, after selling one of her companies, BeateWorks, to Bill Gates in 2006 for millions of dollars, Beate created The Women’s Code.   In February 2012, to reach women everywhere, Beate launched The Women’s Code Online course. http://beatechelette.com/the-womens-code

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Find The Magic Again in What You Do

May 1, 2012 By Leave a Comment

The road traveled can be a tough one. We all go through some pretty heaving things during our lives that can derail us. It’s happened to me several times, and no matter what is going wrong, if I can remember, even for a second, that life is made up of rhythms or phases that come and go, then I know I’ll get through it, just as I have before.

There are simple things you can do that will help you remember how strong, resilient and wonderful you are. Simple things that can help reconnect you with what you love most about you, your life and career. It is all about knowing what life rhythm you’re in at the moment http://beatechelette.com/the-success-process/the-ego-rythym and then getting your mojo back.

Try this: Take a piece of paper and write down your past accomplishments and the challenges you have already overcome. I bet you’ll be able to put quite a list together and guess what? You are still here.

Another thing that I do to move away from feelings of failure is to work on getting back my perspective, my mojo. I take a bike ride to the beach or a hike in the mountains. Anything that makes me realize that I am a small part of a much larger universe. If everything works together in such perfect harmony, and there is a rhythm, then I am a part of it. That means there must be a plan for me.

Maybe a look at photos that mean something to you from those very special moments when you felt on top of the world can help you to get that feeling back. That is the mojo I’m talking about and you’ve got to feel it. Or if you are like me and get a lot out of what you do – get back to the work you love. This is the time to reconnect and feel that magical moment when you become one with what you do. You want to return to the place where your heart opens and that feeling, you know which one I mean, is back and fills you up from head to toe.

Whatever that is for you, reconnect with it today. Do it right now. In my personal experience with hard knocks, I can tell you one thing with certainty—the tougher the test, the better the other side will be.

Beate Chelette is a respected career coach, consummate entrepreneur and founder of The Women’s Code, a unique guide to personal and career success that offers a new code of conduct for today’s business, private and digital world. Determined to build a community of women helping each other, after selling one of her companies, BeateWorks, to Bill Gates in 2006 for millions of dollars, Beate created The Women’s Code.   In February 2012, to reach women everywhere, Beate launched The Women’s Code Online course. http://beatechelette.com/the-womens-code

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CASH is the Essential Four-Letter Word

April 27, 2012 By Leave a Comment

It’s easy to find people who will critique your business and tell you how to run it. But no one actually explains the hard part:  how to make money.  I know many women entrepreneurs who, like me, tend to focus on the creative side of business, with a thousand new ideas racing in our brains, but we don’t want to always deal with routine tasks like accounting. But if you can focus on what aspect of your business makes you the most money right now, you’ll have CASH in the bank. With that comes the freedom to experiment, to grow your business in new directions and take it to the next level.

The pivotal moment of understanding the power of CASH in my career came when I ran a creative photography business. It was doing well. After ten years of major setbacks, financial worries and the threat of bankruptcy, I got to the break-even point. But little did I know, until (I hired) a particularly brilliant controller who understood running financial spreadsheets like no other, and showed me exactly which revenue streams produced the most—and least—income. As it turned out I was doing fantastic with direct sales in my photography business  in Europe, but next to nothing in the U.S. Once I saw what my business looked like on paper, broken down by months, regions and countries, I knew exactly where most of my income actually came from.  So I doubled my sales efforts in Europe and the result was a 300% income increase in only a few short months! Two years later, I sold my company to Bill Gates and made a fortune.  To read more:  http://goo.gl/y7vHy

So what are your numbers telling you? Where should you put your efforts immediately to get the cash in the bank?  Focus on what makes you the most money right now. You can always branch out later.

Beate Chelette is a respected career coach, consummate entrepreneur and founder of The Women’s Code, a unique guide to personal and career success that offers a new code of conduct for today’s business, private and digital world. Determined to build a community of women helping each other, after selling one of her companies, BeateWorks, to Bill Gates in 2006 for millions of dollars, Beate created The Women’s Code.   In February 2012, to reach women everywhere, Beate launched The Women’s Code Online course. http://beatechelette.com/the-womens-code

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Mission Possible: Balancing a Hectic Life

April 8, 2012 By Leave a Comment

If you are like many women, you sometimes feel like exploding because everything in your life seems to pull on you at the same time.  We’re all on a seesaw trying to balance our emotions, our attitudes, and our expectations. I hear from women all the time who say they feel overwhelmed, inadequate and out of balance as they struggle to keep up with career, family, relationships and social obligations. Then there’s financial uncertainty that bears down on many of us.  It is a lot to deal with, and women everywhere are feeling it.  Anxiety rates among women have soared in the last decade. And no wonder. They have one foot on the career gas pedal, they are in a serious relationship or intent on finding one, maybe thinking about when or if to have kids, or they’ve already started a family.  Then there’s yoga or the gym to keep up with but often don’t, because there’s just too much going on.

Getting away has always helped me to relax.

In our frenzied world, is it even possible to achieve balance in our busy lives?  The answer is a resounding yes.  It’s not only possible, but achieving balance is imperative to our mental and physical wellbeing. And to simply enjoying life again. The good news is that there is an effective process that can help you identify—and retune—the areas of your life that have tipped out of balance—and make you feel even better about where you are. Knowing which areas those are and being clear about what you want are always the first steps of awareness. Ask yourself: what area of your life do you want to improve the most?

Maybe it’s learning how to relax, taking time out just for you—and not feeling guilty about it! Maybe right now you need to focus on getting ahead in your career or paying more attention to your husband and kids. You can’t focus on everything at once; no one can.  Something always suffers and it’s usually us.

Here’s a short Balance Test. Find out which areas of your life are in or out of sync. You might be surprised by the results.  http://beatechelette.com/Balancetest

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How To Find A Better Balance In My Busy Life

April 4, 2012 By Leave a Comment

How To Find Balance In My Busy Life

On my last business trip I learned an important lesson on how to find a better balance in my busy life even if I am on the road. I’d like to share with you what I learned.

Find out how being more aware of your choices can help you on a day to day basis to balance your busy life. Often, it is not about big things like going on a vacation that gets us center again but more the little things we do daily.

What are your tricks and tips that you have found that work for you to keep a good balanced?

Watch the video here or click on the image below:  How To Balance Your Busy Life

 

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The Women's Code Goes on the Road

December 28, 2011 By

By Beate Chelette

I’ll be taking my code to Texas.

Although many women joined me for the very first Women’s Code Conference in California last March, and many others are continuing to discover online about our work on behalf of helping women find balance in their lives, I’ve got a great opportunity for anyone who’s going to be in or around Austin, Texas, in early January.

I’m speaking at the fabulous Wizard Academy, that teaching institution for all things wonderful and insightful and counterintuitive that Roy H. Williams founded. Roy himself teaches enlightening courses on everything from “Da Vinci and the 40 Answers,” which provides techniques and perspectives that offer you the keys to innovation, to “Magical Worlds and Advanced Thought Particles,” in which Roy teaches you how to tweak any form of communication – literature, music, painting, architecture, etc. – for higher levels of impact.

As for me, I’ll be there as a guest speaker for the academy’s First Friday, when it opens its doors free to the community once a month, from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. You can not only discover the Wizard Academy, you’ll have a chance to hear me outline the Women’s Code.

I know that if you’re reading my blogs, you have some acquaintance with The Women’s Code, which I created after a life in business – as both an employee and an entrepreneur, as a woman, mother, wife and all-around seeker of wisdom – and which I introduced to women earlier this year.

But I’ll be talking in Austin about how the Women’s Code can be incorporated into the lives of women, and of the men who love them.  This is only a teaser for the full-fledged Women’s Code course, gut you’ll get a taste of some of the insights that I myself have learned through my career.

These include:The Women’s Code Goes on the Road

  • How to recognize the “rhythms” of your life, so that you can understand that everything has a time and place for you
  • How to learn to forgive yourself – and to forgive others – for their actions
  • How to trust other women
  • How to have it all

There’s a lot more – but come to Austin to find out!

Your coach,

Beate

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Support Is All Around

December 22, 2011 By

I Am Pondering About…

Even though there are things I know we have no control over, I still get angry at our helplessness.

Just as a quick recap for you, dear reader, a few weeks ago as I was sailing with good friends in the Caribbean, disconnected from the world, I finally decided to log on when we were near a wifi hotspot. The Facebook app on my iPad had a message that said, “Call me when you can.”

The message came from Melissa, the young woman I’ve written about over the last year. And it was the message that I had feared getting while I was vacationing. Before responding to Melissa’s request to phone her, I checked her mother Louella’s Facebook page, and found that she had passed away.

Even though I knew that her passing was inevitable, I wasn’t prepared for it. I doubt that you can ever prepare yourself. I should have done more. I should be doing more now. But, what do I say? Can I be my usual compassionate tough love self or more delicate and along the lines of you will be OK? With the rapidly approaching holidays Melissa and her sisters are surely feeling the loss of their mother in a significant way.

Especially during the quiet time of the year I too, feel my own limitations. I should be doing more but sometimes I am so overwhelmed with my own life, my own problems that I can’t. The mountain of issues to deal with, tasks to accomplish and people to please seems to be growing by the day.

That feeling of helplessness. Can you relate to it? What did you do to get yourself through it?

But back to the story that I started with. Melissa’s mother passed away November 7. Her funeral is long over and it was heart-wrenching watching her three girls sit there at times stone faced, at times sobbing. Louella’s own mother was there, heartbroken. A sweet Japanese lady who was so overwhelmed with grief that she could barely speak. A memory embedded in my mind, reminding me how unjust it is for a parent to see their children depart.

In all of this, there was a silver lining. To my surprise, though it is in sync with what we talk about as part of The Women’s Code, many of Melissa’s girlfriends showed up to support her. I don’t think I ever saw so many teenagers support one another. Crying and uncomfortable and a little awkward like teenagers are, but they were all there. Some 100 of them filled the church.

No matter what anyone will ever say, there is much more support around us than we often think it is. At times it just takes our opening our eyes and seeing what is in front of us. And that dear reader is my message to you for this season. No matter how difficult it may be, no matter what size your family is (in my case this year it’s my daughter and I), no matter how big or small the gifts under your tree will be, there is still so much support around us.

I call them the little gifts of God. It could be someone telling you, as it happened to me today, that you look great although I was having a terrible self-image day. It can be that a smile, a wave, a gesture that will let you know with absolute certainty that you are supported.

Will you please share your little gifts of God?  In which way have you gotten a message that gave you that feeling of comfort and support recently?

With many blessings.

Your Coach,

Beate

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Of Friends Passing and Lasting Friendship

December 16, 2011 By

By Beate Chelette

Today is the day to face up to responsibilities. Like any other day. Still, this one is different. I am sitting here in my living room waiting until it’s time to go to Louella’s service.

I was on vacation in the British Virgin Islands when I received a note from Melissa that said, “Call me when you get this.” I knew immediately what had happened, and before calling Melissa, I checked her mother’s — my friend’s — Facebook page. She had passed away peacefully.

She died peacefully, but she is no longer here. And she leaves behind a daughter whom, as many of you know, I’ve taken under my wing. My feelings are all over the place. A part of me is almost glad that it’s is over. Because now the inevitable has happened: Louella has died. No miracle occurred, no spontaneous healing took place, the worst-case scenario unfolded.

I am not afraid of death. When my father passed away I had a vision that will stay with me for the rest of my life, a vision about the great beyond, the next and inevitable phase for all of us. I have known for a long time that there is something that comes after this. But still, I am in pain — for Melissa, for her sisters, for her mother, for their lives, for my friendship with them all.

Melissa and I were able to find time to have lunch together in the week after her mother passed away. I am strong. This meeting however took all I had. I didn’t want to cry or lose it in front of my young friend.

Why is it do you think that there are circumstances where we feel safe to let our pain show while at other times we are so bottled up about it?

Maybe you’ve been there, and you can offer advice. Is it better to show my grief in such a public way, or should I follow my instinct and remain strong, that is, quiet and stoic? Honestly, sometimes being strong gets to be a burden. Where do we find balance between giving and getting?

The infinity sign goes both ways

Can you relate to this scenario? You are a giver. You love to give. You give freely and find great joy in recognizing how other people derive joy from the things you do. If someone needs help you are the first one to offer help. You help even when you aren’t asked. Your contributions are sometimes appreciated and other times they go unnoticed. What do you do then?

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A Mother’s Wish

November 12, 2011 By

I realize this is a recurring theme with me lately: to accept or not the situation that life puts us in, especially given the travails of my friends Melissa and her mother, who’s fighting a losing battle with cancer and wishes the best for her daughter.

I’m back and forth between visits and my recuperation from visits. Back at the hospital visiting Melissa’s mother, back at home wondering how to process it all. Forgive me if I appear to judge. I don’t know if it’s actually being judgmental or not – Melissa’s mom doesn’t seem to accept her situation, and I don’t know if it’s my place to tell her what she doesn’t want to here. It’s a battle that can’t be won and I want to help. Yet this battle is not mine to fight nor even mine to bring up. My role – if I even have one – is to support her. Nothing else.  That’s what The Women’s Code is all about: Empowering women and supporting them in their own choices.

Melissa actually came onto a coaching call I made for The Women’s Code. That girl is remarkable – she doesn’t even know how strong she is. She has such beauty inside, and has made her peace with what’s been going on with her mother.

As always, her strength shone through. Her attitude led all the women on the call to reflect. An outpouring of love and support that Melissa drinks from, which has helped her grow tremendously.

We went for dinner to a nice restaurant in my neighborhood. Melissa wondered out loud why I even would do such a thing for her. I told her that I want to show her that there is an entire other world out there that is hers for the taking. She nods, beginning to understand, and begins to enjoy her curry. She relaxed and began to tell me about her ideas for a business to raise money for cancer.

For the first time I saw who she was going to be. Emerging out of this teen was a person I hadn’t seen before. What beauty, what strength, what power. It puts me in tears, still, just thinking about it.

Finally I had a moment where I looked at her grinning ear to ear inside – she will be okay!

The next day I visited Melissa’s mom wondering if this would be the time where I would make her feel what I felt, that perhaps it will be easier for her to let go.

When I entered, the grandparents were in the room as was the hospice volunteer. I told Melissa’s mom everything I talked about the night before and everything I felt. Her tears come, first slowly, then in a rush of emotion. She looked at me and says that her ex pretty much accepted that Melissa would be in a red T-Shirt working at Target and not go to college. He’d written off her future.

But that won’t be the case.

An amazing couple, Brian and Genessy Safdari from College Planning Experts, have stepped forward. They will take on the planning of Melissa’s college education — pro bono. I will share the journey with you once it begins in a few weeks.

When I told this to Melissa’s mother she finally relaxed, hearing that her daughter has been given a chance for further education, a brighter future.

“Emotionally charged” is what might describe my life best.

Let me know how you may relate to what’s going on in my life right now, and how you yourself have handled such intense moments.

Filed Under: Family & Friends
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